It’s my sophomore year of college and so far everything is going great, besides waking up every other morning to sit in on a boring organic chemistry lecture. I’ve been relatively happier than last year, and I think it’s because I’m more open to change. In a previous blog post, I talked about how I not only disliked change, but I was afraid of it. Coming to a new school in a different state was more intimidating that I thought it would be. In high school, I always talked about being the type of person who could adapt to any environment and sort of, go with the flow. Well it’s easier said than done because I felt completely alone last year, and it’s a feeling I wouldn’t wish on anyone.
I’ve realized that college is about myself, growing and changing; it’s about me becoming mature and confident with who I am as a person and who I want to be. Today, I see myself as someone who is open minded, willing to try new things. I am trying to be someone who focuses more on myself, rather than what other people are saying or have said about me. I am definitely stepping outside of my comfort zone. I recently got a job as a tour guide for my university, which is something I would have never thought I’d do. Anyone would describe me as a very shy, quiet, and painfully awkward person, so why would I want to give tours? I figured, what better way gain self-confidence than by growing with a group of individuals who help me overcome my fear of public speaking.
This year I am also focusing on my goals. I’ve been writing down what I want to accomplish, and where I hope to see myself at the end of each semester. In high school, I was more about what everyone else was doing, what people would think was cool or what would make me look better. That was no help in finding out who I was, in fact that was the furthest away from who I consider myself as a person. I think that’s why I had such a difficult time freshman year. I was scared that I wasn’t the person I thought I was. I was scared because I was surrounded by such a different group of people than what I was normally used to, in a completely different environment.
Today I asked my friend, “Do you think you’ve changed as a person since high school?” To which his response was a simple, “Absolutely.” As cliché as it sounds, college is about finding yourself and growing into the person you wish to be. I have been changing every day, whether it’s through my classes, the new clubs I’ve joined, the new friends I make, and my newfound goals. I am excited to see where this year takes me. 🙂